Thursday, December 24, 2020

Age 26 to 36 (2010 to 2020)

(Read in continuation of below post
http://aroonteni.blogspot.com/2009/12/25-years-completed.html )


 In 2010 Febrauary I joined in Chennai-One TCS office. So I stayed with my college mates in Perungudi. That was a seperate villa house and good for a gang of college guys. My mindset after my illusionary life-threat (heartburn after effect) was to enjoy life in next 5 years, because after that I might get married and life will become monotonous. I got my first vehicle ( Bajaj Avenger 200cc - TN 07 BF 2893 - now sold ). In 2011 December I completed 26 age.
 
 In 2011, I had taken my Avenger bike to almost all of the places in and around Chennai. I had trips to Hogenekkal, Bangalore, Theni, Pondicherry & Chidambaram, Salem. Really enjoyed the Bike rides. Life was awesome since I stayed with college friends and time passed so quickly. I attended US L1B visa interview on 8th June 2011. But my visa applicaiton was rejected :( . In August 2011 I got my first car ( Ford Figo zxi TN 22 CY 5629 - now sold ). My college mates (also my room mates) got on-site oppurtunity and left the room. Few others got married and left the room. So I decided to stay alone in a house. I did not wanted to have any room mates. I thought my parents will stay in my house if I stay alone. I moved to a new house in Alandur in July or August 2011. My parents stayed in that house for 2 weeks. But they did not liked to stay too long. My Dad also need to go to his business in Theni. So I cannot demand them to stay too long. I used to take my car to Theni once in every month. I liked the drive in my car to Theni. So I did not felt tired. I actually enjoyed the travel. In December 2011 my uncle, aunt and little-cousins came to a function in Chennai and stayed in my Alandur house during the weekend. We had a trip to Mahabalipuram. That was a memorable trip.
 
 In 2012, my car trip to Theni continuted. I also attended some of my friend's marriage in my car. The car helped in having a good conversation with old-friends when we were travelling to attend our friend's marriage. Really enjoyed those car journey with friends. In April 2012 I got another oppurtunity to join the UK team for an one year assignment. I thought this UK trip will help me in saving money for my marriage. I already ran out of money as I invested in my car, bike and Theni house. So I accepted the UK offer. In April 2012, my brother's marriage was fixed. But I also had to travel to UK in May 2012. So I planned to visit India for my brother's marriage in June 2012 for a week. Life looked too good as my brother's marriage was fixed and next is mine. I travelled to UK in joy !
 UK was now a well known place for me due to my earlier trip in 2009. Same client, same office and same old friends. So life was really fun in 2012 May.
 
 I travelled to India to attend my brother's marriage on 8th June 2012. All seemed good to me. I travelled back to UK in just 3 days as I did not got leave for many days. I had a marriage proposal when I attended my brother's marriage. In July 2012, life took a turn for the worst as my brother's marriage had lot of issues (beyond the scope of this blog). In August 2012, I visited the London with my friends as the London-Olympics-2012 was going on. That was again a nice trip.
 
 My brother's wife and in-laws are not good. My parents could not get out of this mental trauma and suffered lot of physical side-effects. 2012 September , October and November was very very stressful for my mom, dad and me (in UK). Daily phone calls were just my mom crying. I got really stressed. Life all of a sudden looked so bleak. In November 2012 I travelled to India for Diwali. I was able to console my parents in person. I enquired the issue and looked like my brother's in-laws were creating issues to seperate my brother out of our house. I somehow enjoyed the Diwali and travelled back to UK. My brother's marriage owes were on-going and did not had an end in sight. Meanwhile, I also had few other trips in UK with my friends there. These trips were relaxing for my stressful personal life. So I was able to better manage my stress. In December 2012 my Grandmother was not feeling well and was admitted in hospital.
 
 In 2013 January my Grandmother died due to heart and lung ailments. My brother left our house and started living seperately. I was so stressed and started questionging the purpose of my existence. Life looked so meaningless and void. I also felt that I am burned out in Job. So I resigned my Job in UK. That will only complete after my planned release date in May 2013. So I did not had any issue with my release dates. I did not had a job in hand. I just wanted to take a break in life. I let my job go in May 2013 and come to Theni with a 10L rupees. I was jobless and I was in my hometown at this time. This feeling taught me lot of things in life. My Mom and Dad felt better as I stayed with them for 4 months. I tried to find a agriculture land of 1 acre. But I realized that no one will give just 1 acre land. I need to get atleast 5 to 10 acres minimum. So I need atleast 50L to buy a land. So, I dropped the idea of buying a agricultural land. I searched for a job and got one in Hexaware Chennai. I joined Hexaware in 18th Sep 2013. The 4 months break has given me enough time to cope up with burnout-feeling. So I performed better. The clients were happy with my performance and life seemed better (not good). 
 
 In 2014, life was relatively better. But my mom and dad were worried always about my Brother's life. I did not voted in the General Elections. But Modi's BJP won the election by a huge margin. I did not liked a religous party rule. But did not worried too much also. I was in a mindset of wait-and-watch. My parents  searched a bride for me and could not find any match as per my requirement. So this also stressed them. I was also worried a lot and even thought of not marrying if I did not find a real match. I expected a working wife as I know my financial background is not good after my brother dumped our family.
 
In 2015, My dad had syncope (feeling dizzy and passing out) frequently and mostly at 3 am or 4 am in the early morning. My mom was so scared as my brother has gone away from us and I am also staying away. All of sudden this problem escalted as bigger issue as my Dad has many syncope episodes. Finally doctors's found the issue to be a 'Brugada Syndrome' which is a abrnormal electric-signal to heart that causes zero blood ouput from heart and thereby oxygen deprivation. If the heart is not restarted (naturally or artificially) within 15 minutes, it will lead to death. So doctors suggested an artificial way of solving the problem - with a defibrillator. So my Dad undergone a surgery in June 2015 to place a defibrillator (called as AICD) at Madras-Medical-Mission (MMM) hospital at Chennai. This device was supposed to restart the heart if any abnormality is found. The whole procedure costed close to 5 L. I got 2 L from insurance and 3 L from my own pocket. The money was not a big problem as I was earning decently. But my father's incidents occasionaly happened but not very frequently. In August 2015 I got a marriage proposal. In September this marriage proposal was confirmed after I met Ananthi and had a conversation. 2015 October and November was very busy with Marriage activity. Marriage happened as per plan and everything (marriage hall, food ) was superb. We took a honeymoon trip to Wayanad. Returned back to my Chennai home and started new life after marriage in November 2015. Chennai was partially flooded by then. In just a week the BIG EVENT happened in 1st December 2015. The biggest rain and biggest flood of the century happened in Chennai.

In 2016 Jan I an my wife had a trip to Besant Nagar beach. While returning from the Beach MTC bus rear-ended our car and broke the Boot-door. I had to deal with that issue with insurance and Ford body-shop. In 2016 Jan 25/26 I started feeling dizzy spells while walking. In Feb 2016, I visited Theni to attend a marriage in Madurai. I checked the dizziness issue with my usual doctor in Theni. He did blood tests and noticed Triglyceride levels are high and put me on statins for next 3 months. After taking statins, the dizziness gone completely. But now this issue is nagging me from behind to improve my health. I did walking and took statins and lost almost 8 kg in 3 months. I felt fit enough. Then I stopped the statins and started gaining weight little bit. But not vey much.
In May 2016 my relatives (aunts and cosins) and my parents stayed in my Chennai home for two weeks. We all attended my cousins marriage in Chennai and also visited Mahabalipuram, Vandalur zoo, shopping mall, etc.

2017, 2018 just flew away as I and my wife travelled a lot to attend marriages and some plesure trips. 
In 2017 April, we had a family trip to Thekkady.
In 2018 March, I and my wife had a trip to Yercaud 
In 2018 Diwali, I and my in-laws had a trip to Kollam.
 No big issues with my parents health in those two years. My Dad retired from his business in 2017 and stayed at home mostly. He occasionally visit our shop if any help is needed. The biggest concern I had was of the fact that we did not have a child yet. I was actually enjoying a free time after few stressful years (2012, 2013 and 2015). So I did not reacted much for the issue with child. But still started check up with doctors on this. I also completed some medical studies myself in these years related to child-birth. I felt that I was so dumb to know the science of our reproductive system so late. But I am damn sure 99% of common people don't know what I know now. I had read about this because we faced issue with having a child. Most of the normal couples having a child in their first year will not have read about the reproductive system (because obviously they did not need to ).

In 2019, I did not know what to do with life. Because the obvious next-step (having a child) is not happening. I should thank the society as none of our relatives pressurized us to have child. So we dealt with this issue in a relaxed mindset (which is really nice). In April 2019 I purchase a plot in Theni. My dad helped with the deal and so it was easy for me. In May 2019, I voted against BJP (religious party). But my bad, BJP came into power again. That was one stressful event. In June 2019 we had a visit to Theni and had a trip to Thekkady on a Sunday. We returned back to Chennai on Monday morning. On tuesday early morning my Dad had a heart attack and admitted to Vadamalayan hospital Madurai. On hearing that news, I was shocked and could not control my feeling. I flew to Madurai and next 10 days were very stressful. My Dad survived the heart-attack due to the AICD device we implanted in 2015. Thank god he survived. But life is not the same now. I stayed in my hometown for one month and helped with my mom and dad, until my dad got better. In November 2019, I and my wife attended a marriage in Thrissur and had a trip to Guruvayur, Ernakulam & Cochin. This is very memorable trip. In December 2019 my dad lost blood heamoglobin levels and was admitted again in Vadamalayan. This time around they found that my Dad's liver was damaged lot and that caused blood loss in his esophagus. More sorrowful event and more stress. I know these things will happen with age. But I cannot accept that my Dad is getting all these diseases. I cannot cope up with the universal truths. My life had no reason to celebrate. My friends are all settled in their married life and all I can see is my Job and office friends. Atleast I have very good office friends to cope up with my stress.

In 2020, Jan my parents stayed in my CHennai house for a month after my Dad's liver problem. In March first week my parents travelled back to Theni. By this time the COVID 19 has become famous and in March 20th India went into lockdown. My dad need to have regular checkups for his liver and heart ailments. So I travelled to Theni along with my wife on 10th May 2020 after getting e-pass with my Dad's medical reports. We stayed in Theni and Madurai from May 2020 to Sep 2020. on 10th October 2020 we returned back to Chennai.

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